⭕️ The 5 Stages of Every Leader of Today

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Hey my friend,

Last week, I was listening to a Diary of a CEO episode where Steven Bartlett interviewed Alex Hormozi, and something he said hit me hard.

He broke down the 5 stages of entrepreneurship, and the moment I heard it, I thought:

"I need to share this with my community”

So, I sat with it, reflected on it, and tried to contextualize it for our community—because this doesn’t just apply to entrepreneurs. It applies to anyone trying to build something from scratch—whether you’re an artist, activist, athlete, changemaker, or creator.

And honestly?

I’ve lived this cycle more times than I can count.

After stepping back from For the Menstruator, I bounced between ideas—podcasting, newsletters, community building, an agency, consulting, content creation—constantly searching for the thing.

But what I didn’t realize was that I was stuck in a loop.

I’d get excited about something, work on it, hit a wall, see a new trend everyone else is doing and then jump to something new, convinced that this one would be different.

Sound familiar?

Let’s break this down.

read time: 4 mins

p.s: seems like a lot of emails are still not getting delivered, do you mind making sure you move this to your primary inbox, click any link on the newsletter and reply with “Hi Ziyaan” - will be super helpful

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The 5 Stages of Every Big Dream

Every person trying to build something real—whether it’s a business, a creative project, or a movement—goes through five predictable stages.

The problem?

Most people quit at Stage 3.

They get stuck in a cycle, jumping from idea to idea, never realizing how close they were to breaking through.

Here’s how it happens:

Stage 1: Uninformed Optimism

"This is it. This opportunity is going to change everything."

This is when you first fall in love with an idea.

A business. A social impact project. A creative pursuit. A sport.

It’s like seeing a pretty girl in a red dress across the room.

You don’t know much about her, but she looks amazing, mysterious, perfect.

And you think: This is the one. This is what I’ve been waiting for.

So you go all in.

You buy the domain. You start the Instagram page. You tell everyone about it.

And then… reality hits.

Stage 2: Informed Pessimism

"Wait… this is way harder than I thought."

Suddenly, things aren’t as effortless as they seemed.

• There are challenges you didn’t expect.

• There’s more competition than you realized.

• There are skills you don’t have yet.

It’s like when you finally start dating the girl in the red dress—and you start noticing things you didn’t see at first.

She leaves dishes in the sink.
She texts back slower than you like.
She snores.

And now, the magic starts to fade.

For most people, this is where doubt kicks in.

And they start looking for something new.

Stage 3: The Valley of Despair

"Screw this. I’m done. This isn’t working."

This is where most people quit.

Because now, you’re frustrated, overwhelmed, and tired.

And right at this moment, you see it—

Another pretty girl in a red dress.

A new idea. A better opportunity. A different project.

And suddenly, all the flaws in your current pursuit seem unbearable.

And the new thing?

It looks perfect.

So you drop what you’re doing and chase something else.

And then… the cycle repeats.

Over.
And over.
And over again.

Stage 4: Informed Optimism

"Okay… I think I finally get it."

If you push past Stage 3, something shifts.

You stop looking for an escape and start figuring things out.

• You understand the real work that goes into success.

• You see that every path comes with challenges.

• You realize that the grass is always greener… but it’s also fertilized with shit.

And now, instead of running from the struggle, you start working through it.

And then?

You hit Stage 5.

Stage 5: Achievement

"I made it. And now I know how to do it again."

This is where things finally click.

• You land the opportunities you once dreamed of.

• You become great at your craft.

• You build something real—not just another abandoned idea.

And now, when you set bigger goals, you don’t fool yourself into thinking it’ll be easy.

You already know the process:

→ You’ll get excited.
→ You’ll hit resistance.
→ You’ll want to quit.
→ You’ll push through.
→ You’ll win.

And because you’ve done it once, you can do it again.

Where Are You Right Now?

Take a second to reflect.

What stage are you currently in?

1. Uninformed Optimism – Just getting started, feeling excited.

2. Informed Pessimism – Realizing it’s harder than expected.

3. Valley of Despair – Feeling stuck, frustrated, ready to quit.

4. Informed Optimism – Seeing progress, understanding the path.

5. Achievement – Reached success, now looking to scale.

If you’re at Stage 3, I have one piece of advice for you:

Pick your shit.

Every idea, every business, every career path, every passion project comes with struggle.

The key isn’t finding something that’s easy.

The key is sticking with something long enough to win.

So whatever you’re working on right now—commit.

Push through.

Your future self will thank you for it.

With you on this journey,

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